Shut Down - Power Failure

What happens when you feel that life is better off when u r alone...

What happens when you feel that u have no one to talk to...

What happens when you feel that you can't talk to the person who understands u most...

What happens when you feel that you are alone...

What happens when you feel that you dont know how to live by urself anymore...

What happens when you feel that you cant cry to the person who u depend on the most...

What happens when you feel that you want to shut urself from the world...

What happens when you feel that having a fake smile plastered is easier that dealing with everything else...

What happens when you feel that your joyful laughter and most sincere smile is forever gone...

What happens when you feel that you...

Do not feel anything at all...

I think I'm sick...
I have bruises all over my body...
Dont know how i got them...
Cepat je lebam sana sini...
Weird...

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI

KEPADA SEMUA KAUM KELUARGA, SAHABAT HANDAL,

TEMAN-TEMAN, KAKAK-KAKAK, ADIK-ADIK,

ABANG-ABANG SEKALIAN...

DI SINI SAYA / WAHIDA/ IDA / AKAK / ADIK

INGIN MENGUCAPKAN

......SELAMAT HARI RAYA, MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN......

.....DARI HUJUNG RAMBUT SAMPAI HUJUNG RAMBUT KAKI.....

.....DI ATAS SEBARANG KETELANJURAN KATA.....

......TERKASAR BAHASA......

......TERMAKAN TERMINUM.....

......TERLUPA TERABAIKAN......

.....SEMOGA RAYA PADA TAHUN INI.....

.....MEMBAWA KEBERKATAN DAN KEINSAFAN KEPADA KITA SEMUA.....

3 Different Meanings to My Life (c)

Emilia - Big Big World

I'm a big big girl

In a big big world

It's not a big big thing if u leave me

But I do do feel

That I do do will

Miss u much Miss u much

I can see the first leafs falling

It's all yellow and nice

It's so very cold outside

Like the way I'm feeling inside

I'm a big big girl

In a big big world

It's not a big big thing if u leave me

But I do do feel

That I do do will

Miss u much Miss u much

Outside it's no raining

And tears are falling from my eyes

Why did it have to happen

Why did it all have to end

I'm a big big girl

In a big big world

It's not a big big thing if u leave me

But I do do feel

That I do do will

Miss u much Miss u much

I have your arms around me

Warm like fire

But when I open my eyes......

Your gone

I'm a big big girl

In a big big world

It's not a big big thing if u leave me

But I do do feel

That I do do will

Miss u much

Miss u much

I'm a big big girl

In a big big world

It's not a big big thing

If u leave me

But I do Feel I will

Miss u much miss u much

3 Different Meanings to My Life (b)

Kenangan Terindah by Samsons


Aku yang lemah tanpamu

Aku yang rentan karena

Cinta yang t'lah hilang

Darimu yang mampu menyanjungku

Selama mata terbuka

Sampai jantung tak berdetak

Selama itu pun aku mampu

Untuk mengenangmu

Darimu kutemukan hidupku

Bagiku kaulah cinta sejati

Bila yang tertulis untukku

Adalah yang terbaik untukmu

Kan kujadikan kau

Kenangan yang terindah dalam hidupku

Namun takkan mudah bagiku

Meninggalkan jejak hidupku

Yang t'lah terukir abadi
Sebagai kenangan yang terindah

Darimu kutemukan hidupku

Bagiku kaulah cinta sejati

3 Different Meanings to My Life (a)

Colbie Caillat - Fallin’ For You

I don’t know but

I think I maybe

Fallin’ for you

Dropping so quickly

Maybe I should

Keep this to myself

Waiting ’til I Know you better

I am trying

Not to tell you

But I want to

I’m scared of what you’ll say

So I’m hiding what I’m feeling

But I’m tired of

Holding this inside my head

I’ve been spending all my time

Just thinking about ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’ve been waiting all my life and now I found ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’m fallin’ for you

As I’m standing here

And you hold my hand

Pull me towards you

And we start to dance

All around us

I see nobody

Here in silence

It’s just you and me

I’m trying

Not to tell you

But I want to

I’m scared of what you’ll say

So I’m hiding what I’m feeling

But I’m tired of

Holding this inside my head

I’ve been spending all my time

Just thinking about ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’ve been waiting all my life

and now I found ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’m fallin’ for you

Oh I just can’t take it

My heart is racing

The emotions keep spinning out

I’ve been spending all my time

Just thinking about ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’ve been waiting all my life

and now I found ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’m fallin’ for you

I can’t stop thinking about it

I want you all around me

And now I just can’t hide it

I think I’m fallin’ for you (x2)

I’m fallin’ for you
OoohhhOh no noOooooohhhOh I’m fallin’ for you

Over Indulging

Ya Allah...camne nak buat nih...

I was so confident that I could do it...tapi tak menjadi...

How am i supposed to get rid of this habit...

Bila tensen je...melantak tak hingat donia...

Bila sedih je mula la membeli makanan tak hingat2...

Dah la metabolism rate badan rendah...

Lambat memburn away the fat...

So bila dok over indulging camne la nak kurus...

I know I can do it tapi dgn all the tension thats going on lately...

Tak menjadi...frust sgt dgn diri sendiri...

I used to be very in control of my life...

I used to be very independant...

Used to be able to limit myself...

Help...i dont want over indulge myself with food...

I want to be healthy and refine...

I want to be fit and active...

I want to look nice and pretty...

Penat dan sedih bila nak beli baju takde saiz

Sayu tgk org shopping baju mcm2 design tapi baju size besar design mcm hampeh

Kecik hati bila selalu dijadikan bahan lawak jenaka org...

Abg tlg ida...

Tensennyer!!!!

NOTHING

I dunno what to say...

I feel lost...

I feel as if I have burdened everyone...

I feel as if I'm worthless...

I feel as if I'm only trouble to everyone...

I feel as if everyone is better off without me in their lives...

I feel as if I am only a bearer of sadness...

I feel as if I make everyone feel obliged to be responsible towards me...



I feel as if it should have been me...



I feel as if its better that I just vanish...

I feel as if its better that I just let go off everyone...

I feel as if its better that nobody knows me...

I feel as if its better that no one gets close to me...

I feel as if its better that I don't exist in anyone's life...




I don't want anyone else to be hurt because of me...

I don't want anyone to feel responsible for something because of me...

I don't want anyone to go through hardship because of me...




I want everyone else to be happy...

I want everyone else to be safe...

I want everyone else to be the best that they can be...




I don't want to be in the way...

NEW WORK...NEW LIFE...NEW EXPERIENCE

rasa macam sudah lamanya tak menulis blog ini...

nak buat camne, gue menulis bukan untuk meng'update' about aktiviti harian...i mean, whats fun to know about what ordinary things that u do all day...and so i write when there is something worth to write and discuss...

21 JULY 2009

Was officially my first interview for work...the interview was ok and so i got the job... Project Executive of My E.G Services Berhad. Thrilled, excited and happy (i guess)...

22 JULY 2009

Was my last day as a staff working for the culture and arts unit of IIUM. Sad, yes...happy, a bit... Got off from work at 9pm or so...finish up some last minute unsettled jobs etc...reminiscing on the good ol times....haha

23 JULY 2009

Was my 1st day at the new office...awkward, yes....scared, no. Guess everything was ok. luckily i had my friend with me. a lot to learn n so little time. the job is ok except for the many technical things that we have to memorize...dah kata keje dgn e-government...bnyk procedure2 kena tau la...baru first day keje dah dpt jadual roadtour utk My E.G...ada exhibition around Malaysia...

So here goes:

Kuching Waterfront (26 July - 3 Aug 2009) - kena pergi

Star Parade, Kedah (31 July - 3 Aug 2009)

Setiu, Tganu (9 Aug - 11 Aug 2009) - kena pergi

Pagoh Sport Cmplx, Jhr (30 July - 3 Aug 2009)

And i am involved with the one in Kuching and Tganu... balik semenanjung tak sampai seminggu dah kena g tganu plak...wah sakan la aku pasni... tapi balik2 tu kena masuk kerja...and ingatkan nak rehat2 jap ari sabtu...tiba2...

8 Aug 2009 - Kenduri Cukur jambul k.aja...

and to make things much more complicated....semalam baru tau

8 Aug 2009 (gak) - Interview PTD...adeh la

Waduh...

24 JULY 2009

Fenin nak adjust schedule...dah tau kepentingan adanya planner...kalau tak plan btol2...niaya je jawabnya...

Short Stories (Really Short)

Read yanna's post last week....(i think)

Liked the post on writing short stories using only 6 words...

Precise and concise...

So, I wanna try...

See if i can get the words right...

Here goes...


on LIFE

Life sucks. Take it. Leave it.

on WORK

The boss, bossy. The staff, missing.

on FINANCIAL

Money is vital. Don't have any.

on LOVE

Its troubling. Yet you want it.

on MARRIAGE

Its an institution. Solid hard.

on FRIENDSHIP

Friendship blossoms like flower. Ever beautiful.

on PROBLEMS

Problems are like a river. Neverending.

on DREAMS

Hit the road. Get your dream.

What They Didn't Tell Us...

Have you ever heard of discourse analysis...well its a subject we have to take as a student...
Its a subject where they teach u that what ever we say can have another meaning...its something like double meaning where what u say have 2 different meanings whether u meant it or not... discourse analysis is when u say something but something else is implied...

I have often wondered what would be the use of that particular subject as i wont be in the teaching field...

And somehow, in this last few days...I have gotten my answer....its like an epiphany...a revelation...

Since this is a season for marriage as it is the school holidays...i learnt the use of discourse analysis when i tried to understand what is love...

When people are in love everything seems so beatifullllllllllllll...full of birds chirping...butterflies fluttering...flowers blossoming here and there...the skies are blue...the rainbows are nice... pendek kata...everything is just heavenly...

When u ask what is love...people would say that love is kind...love is happiness...love is having somebody there for u...love is what keeps u going.... (here comes the discourse analysis...........................)

BUT WHAT THEY DIDN'T TELL U IS THAT...

Love is not just that...its more than that...there's a lot of things that they didnt tell u...they just tell whats nice...
When they say that

Love is kind...another implied meaning is that....love is also cruel

Love is happiness...another implied meaning is that love is also sadness....

Love is having somebody there for u...would mean that u would have to be alone since he/she is not there for u....

and

Love is what keeps u going...yeah right...love is what also stops u from moving on...

Why didn't anyone tell us of all this???

U feel that u are dispirited if he/she is not around...
The terrible feeling of missing someone when he/she is not there...
The pain of anticipation and waiting...
The sadness when u know that he/she is sad and u cant do anything...
The helpless and hopeless feeling that u have when u cant be there...
The anxiousness...resahnye...tak senang duduk when u feel that something is a miss....

They didnt tell u all that...why....
Love is not all flowers and rainbows...
Its also not all colourful and beautiful...

Its ... just not what it seems...

Another Test...huhu

Your Working Style

You are friendly, adaptable realists. You rely on what you see, hear, and know first-hand. You good-naturedly accept and use the facts around you. You look for a satisfying solution instead of trying to impose any "should" or "must" of your own. You are sure a satisfying solution will turn up once you have grasped all the facts.

You solve problems by being adaptable, and often can get other to adapt, too. People generally like you well enough to consider any compromise you suggest. You are unprejudiced open-minded, and tolerant of most everyone--including yourself. You take things as they are and thus may be very good at easing a tense situation and pulling conflicting factions together.

With your focus on the current situation and realistic acceptance of what exists, you can be a gifted problem solver. Because you are not necessarily bound by a need to follow standard procedures or preferred methods, you are often able to see ways of achieving a goal by "using" the existing rules, systems, or circumstances in new ways, rather than allowing them to be roadblocks.

You are actively curious about people, activities, food, objects, scenery, or anything new presented to your senses. Your expert abilities in using your senses may show in:

• a continuous ability to see the need of the moment and turn easily to meet it
• the ability to absorb, apply and remember great numbers of facts
• an artistic taste and judgement
• the handling of tools and materials

You make your decisions by using the personal values of feeling rather than the logical analysis of thinking. Your feeling makes you tactful, sympathetic, interested in people, and especially good at handling human contacts. You may be too easy in matters of discipline. You learn far more from first-hand experience than from books, and do better in actual situations than on written tests. Abstract ideas and theories are not likely to be trusted by you until you have been tested in experience. You may have to work harder than other people to achieve in school, but can do so when you see the relevance.

You do best in careers needing realism, action, and adaptability. Examples are health services, sales, design, transportation, entertainment, secretarial or office work, food service, supervising work groups, machine operation, and many kinds of troubleshooting.

You are strong in the art of living. You get a lot of fun out of life, which makes you good company. You enjoy your material possessions and take the time to acquire you. You find much enjoyment in good food, clothes, music, and art. You enjoy physical exercise and sports, and usually are good at these.

How effective you are depends on how much judgment you acquire. You may need to develop your feeling so that they can use your values to provide standards for your behavior, and direction and purpose in your lives. If your judgment is not developed enough to give you any character or stick-to-it-iveness, you are in danger of adapting mainly to your own love of a good time.

I Wanted To Know Myself....

• I took the "What Does Your Birthday Says About You" quiz dekat facebook...

Verdict (those who are born in october):

Loves to chat. Loves those who loves them. Loves to takes things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care of what others think. Emotional. Decisive. Strong clairvoyance. Loves to travel, the arts and literature. Touchy and easily jealous. Concerned. Loves outdoors. Just and fair. Spendthrift. Easily influenced. Easily loses confidence. Loves children.

• I took the "Personality Quiz" at www.quizbox.com

Verdict:

Kind and Gentle Your kindness is your charm - you are also gentle and sweet. Everybody likes to be around people with your personality. Like a psychologist, people like to talk to you to discuss their problems because you are proper and discrete, as well as confident. You look mature and people respect you. People with this kind of character are few and far between.

• I took the "Know Your True Self" quiz at www.quizbox.com (seems really true...try it)

Verdict:

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you meet that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing, just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

• I took the "What Does Being A Friend Really Means To You" quiz at www.quizbox.com

Verdict :

You value your friendships: 70%

You love your friends very much - so much so that it's actually quite a worry. You may not be able to cope very well when you do lose somebody's friendship. You are a very sensitive and fragile person, and are therefore likely to get upset easily. You care for your friends and are willing to do anything that they ask you to do. Sometimes this can make your friends think that you are a bit of a nuisance. Nevertheless, people do really love you because your highest priority is your friends.


Hemmm......

PRE-MARRIAGE COURSE (28-29 MARCH 2009)

Assalamualaikum w.b.t

PRE MARRIAGE COURSE

Date: 28^th and 29^th March 2009

Venue: Main Audi

Organized by: Student Development Division (S-Dev) in Collaboration with Jabatan Agama Islam Selangor

REGISTRATION

Registration Venue: S-Dev Main Office

Registration Fee: RM35.00 (to be paid before 25^th March 2009)

***(Including handout, refreshment and lifetime certificate from JAIS)

CONTACT PERSON:

Sr. Rusnani Din @ Yaakob / 03-61965474

Sr. Fazlina Abu Bakar / 03-61964000 (ext:3641)

Sr. Hazanariah Che Hamid 03-61964000 (ext:3635)

Br. Effendi Ismail 03-61964000 (ext:3633)

FIRST COME FIRST SERVE BASIS

*******GUE PROMOTE JER K!!!*********

Dilema Hidup...

Apa nak buat sekarang....

Sangat tertekan kebelakangan ni...

Kerja yang dijanjikan tak dapat....alasannya konon dah blow budget so post yang di offer tak dapat nak diberikan.... so sekarang nih, nak disuruh jadi asst trainer plak...pagi keje partime admin, mlm plak jadi asst trainer.... hebatnya idup...alamatnya takde lifelah nanti kan...ptg mlm asyik keje je...

I know i can find better jobs tapi takut nak melangkah... camne nih?? i know i have the skills and attitude 2 work outside but i am not ready... i feel that i am still in need of my comfort zone... takutnya... ya allah, apa nak buat...

keje berclaim gaji nih payah...bukan tak bersyukur tapi dpt keje ptg n mlm 2 mmg cukup lenient time framenyer tapi bila claim by hour nih tak tentu bila bleh dapat paymentnya...kalau lambat, jenuh la hidup... sedangkan idup ni memerlukan duit utk diteruskan...

rasa kadang2 tu macam dah cukup berani utk teruskan melangkah ke dunia luar tapi kata2 org disekeliling membuatkan aku terhenti... ada yang berkata aku budak baik, tak mungkin bleh survive dlm dunia dekat luar tuh... ada yang kata aku ni lurus sgt, nanti culture shock klu dah keje... ada yang kata aku ni terlampau baik hati, nanti mesti kena pijak...

mmg kdg2 tu kita tak perlu fikir apa yg org kata....tapi at times apa yg org kata 2 ada hikmahnya, ada kebenarannya... hidup ni ada 4 cermin yg perlu kita take into account.

1-apa yg kita nampak n org pun nampak
2-apa yg kita nampak tp org tak nampak
3-apa yg kita tak nampak tp org nampak

lastly

4-apa yg kita n org pun tak nampak...ini berserah pada Allah la

so nak just dismiss apa yg org kata, maybe org 2 dah buat pemerhatian...and maybe kita yg tak kenal diri sendri...aduh...takutnya...maybe apa yg org kata 2 btol...aduh...

tapi klu tak beranikan diri n take the challenge, sampai bila baru nak bersediakan... tak kan la sampai bila2 nak bagi alasan sebab tak bersedia...

ya allah...kurniakanlah aku teman yg dapat bantu mengharungi hidup nih... yg dapat bimbing n beri tunjuk ajar dlm membuat keputusan... yg dpt memberi perlindungan dan sokongan dikala kesusahan...

rAiN ChEcK??

So sahabat2...apa cer lately nih?? borink ? takde plan pa pe? apalagi...jom arr g meronggeng2 ke IB...g tgk teater ke concert ke pa pe...

FEBRUARY

6 - 21 feb 09 : Puteri Gunung Ledang

27 Feb - 1 mac 09 : Konsert Alam M.Nasir


MARCH

4 - 8 Mac 09 : Iruvar

9 - 22 Mac 09 : Sirah Junjungan (UIA terlibat!!!) the musical

24 Mac 09 : 24 hours Theatre

20 - 22 Mac 09 : KL Koleidoskop, Konsert Gala DiRaja


APRIL

3 - 5 Apr 09 : Mimpi Adaptasi Shakespeare

10 - 12 Apr 09 : Konsert Untukmu Wanita

17 - 19 Apr 09 : Unplugged Malaysia Band featuring OAG


apa lagi...mari la beramai2 weh...borink dah ni asyik dok dekat opis nih...

Tengah WENG...

"Andaiku tiada, andaiku pejam mata
Biarku abadi, kasih yang setia ini
Biarpun kau jauh, sambutlah salamku..."

-tribute to alleycats