3 Different Meanings to My Life (b)

Kenangan Terindah by Samsons


Aku yang lemah tanpamu

Aku yang rentan karena

Cinta yang t'lah hilang

Darimu yang mampu menyanjungku

Selama mata terbuka

Sampai jantung tak berdetak

Selama itu pun aku mampu

Untuk mengenangmu

Darimu kutemukan hidupku

Bagiku kaulah cinta sejati

Bila yang tertulis untukku

Adalah yang terbaik untukmu

Kan kujadikan kau

Kenangan yang terindah dalam hidupku

Namun takkan mudah bagiku

Meninggalkan jejak hidupku

Yang t'lah terukir abadi
Sebagai kenangan yang terindah

Darimu kutemukan hidupku

Bagiku kaulah cinta sejati

3 Different Meanings to My Life (a)

Colbie Caillat - Fallin’ For You

I don’t know but

I think I maybe

Fallin’ for you

Dropping so quickly

Maybe I should

Keep this to myself

Waiting ’til I Know you better

I am trying

Not to tell you

But I want to

I’m scared of what you’ll say

So I’m hiding what I’m feeling

But I’m tired of

Holding this inside my head

I’ve been spending all my time

Just thinking about ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’ve been waiting all my life and now I found ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’m fallin’ for you

As I’m standing here

And you hold my hand

Pull me towards you

And we start to dance

All around us

I see nobody

Here in silence

It’s just you and me

I’m trying

Not to tell you

But I want to

I’m scared of what you’ll say

So I’m hiding what I’m feeling

But I’m tired of

Holding this inside my head

I’ve been spending all my time

Just thinking about ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’ve been waiting all my life

and now I found ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’m fallin’ for you

Oh I just can’t take it

My heart is racing

The emotions keep spinning out

I’ve been spending all my time

Just thinking about ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’ve been waiting all my life

and now I found ya

I don’t know what to do

I think I’m fallin’ for you

I’m fallin’ for you

I can’t stop thinking about it

I want you all around me

And now I just can’t hide it

I think I’m fallin’ for you (x2)

I’m fallin’ for you
OoohhhOh no noOooooohhhOh I’m fallin’ for you

Over Indulging

Ya Allah...camne nak buat nih...

I was so confident that I could do it...tapi tak menjadi...

How am i supposed to get rid of this habit...

Bila tensen je...melantak tak hingat donia...

Bila sedih je mula la membeli makanan tak hingat2...

Dah la metabolism rate badan rendah...

Lambat memburn away the fat...

So bila dok over indulging camne la nak kurus...

I know I can do it tapi dgn all the tension thats going on lately...

Tak menjadi...frust sgt dgn diri sendiri...

I used to be very in control of my life...

I used to be very independant...

Used to be able to limit myself...

Help...i dont want over indulge myself with food...

I want to be healthy and refine...

I want to be fit and active...

I want to look nice and pretty...

Penat dan sedih bila nak beli baju takde saiz

Sayu tgk org shopping baju mcm2 design tapi baju size besar design mcm hampeh

Kecik hati bila selalu dijadikan bahan lawak jenaka org...

Abg tlg ida...

Tensennyer!!!!

NOTHING

I dunno what to say...

I feel lost...

I feel as if I have burdened everyone...

I feel as if I'm worthless...

I feel as if I'm only trouble to everyone...

I feel as if everyone is better off without me in their lives...

I feel as if I am only a bearer of sadness...

I feel as if I make everyone feel obliged to be responsible towards me...



I feel as if it should have been me...



I feel as if its better that I just vanish...

I feel as if its better that I just let go off everyone...

I feel as if its better that nobody knows me...

I feel as if its better that no one gets close to me...

I feel as if its better that I don't exist in anyone's life...




I don't want anyone else to be hurt because of me...

I don't want anyone to feel responsible for something because of me...

I don't want anyone to go through hardship because of me...




I want everyone else to be happy...

I want everyone else to be safe...

I want everyone else to be the best that they can be...




I don't want to be in the way...

NEW WORK...NEW LIFE...NEW EXPERIENCE

rasa macam sudah lamanya tak menulis blog ini...

nak buat camne, gue menulis bukan untuk meng'update' about aktiviti harian...i mean, whats fun to know about what ordinary things that u do all day...and so i write when there is something worth to write and discuss...

21 JULY 2009

Was officially my first interview for work...the interview was ok and so i got the job... Project Executive of My E.G Services Berhad. Thrilled, excited and happy (i guess)...

22 JULY 2009

Was my last day as a staff working for the culture and arts unit of IIUM. Sad, yes...happy, a bit... Got off from work at 9pm or so...finish up some last minute unsettled jobs etc...reminiscing on the good ol times....haha

23 JULY 2009

Was my 1st day at the new office...awkward, yes....scared, no. Guess everything was ok. luckily i had my friend with me. a lot to learn n so little time. the job is ok except for the many technical things that we have to memorize...dah kata keje dgn e-government...bnyk procedure2 kena tau la...baru first day keje dah dpt jadual roadtour utk My E.G...ada exhibition around Malaysia...

So here goes:

Kuching Waterfront (26 July - 3 Aug 2009) - kena pergi

Star Parade, Kedah (31 July - 3 Aug 2009)

Setiu, Tganu (9 Aug - 11 Aug 2009) - kena pergi

Pagoh Sport Cmplx, Jhr (30 July - 3 Aug 2009)

And i am involved with the one in Kuching and Tganu... balik semenanjung tak sampai seminggu dah kena g tganu plak...wah sakan la aku pasni... tapi balik2 tu kena masuk kerja...and ingatkan nak rehat2 jap ari sabtu...tiba2...

8 Aug 2009 - Kenduri Cukur jambul k.aja...

and to make things much more complicated....semalam baru tau

8 Aug 2009 (gak) - Interview PTD...adeh la

Waduh...

24 JULY 2009

Fenin nak adjust schedule...dah tau kepentingan adanya planner...kalau tak plan btol2...niaya je jawabnya...

Short Stories (Really Short)

Read yanna's post last week....(i think)

Liked the post on writing short stories using only 6 words...

Precise and concise...

So, I wanna try...

See if i can get the words right...

Here goes...


on LIFE

Life sucks. Take it. Leave it.

on WORK

The boss, bossy. The staff, missing.

on FINANCIAL

Money is vital. Don't have any.

on LOVE

Its troubling. Yet you want it.

on MARRIAGE

Its an institution. Solid hard.

on FRIENDSHIP

Friendship blossoms like flower. Ever beautiful.

on PROBLEMS

Problems are like a river. Neverending.

on DREAMS

Hit the road. Get your dream.

What They Didn't Tell Us...

Have you ever heard of discourse analysis...well its a subject we have to take as a student...
Its a subject where they teach u that what ever we say can have another meaning...its something like double meaning where what u say have 2 different meanings whether u meant it or not... discourse analysis is when u say something but something else is implied...

I have often wondered what would be the use of that particular subject as i wont be in the teaching field...

And somehow, in this last few days...I have gotten my answer....its like an epiphany...a revelation...

Since this is a season for marriage as it is the school holidays...i learnt the use of discourse analysis when i tried to understand what is love...

When people are in love everything seems so beatifullllllllllllll...full of birds chirping...butterflies fluttering...flowers blossoming here and there...the skies are blue...the rainbows are nice... pendek kata...everything is just heavenly...

When u ask what is love...people would say that love is kind...love is happiness...love is having somebody there for u...love is what keeps u going.... (here comes the discourse analysis...........................)

BUT WHAT THEY DIDN'T TELL U IS THAT...

Love is not just that...its more than that...there's a lot of things that they didnt tell u...they just tell whats nice...
When they say that

Love is kind...another implied meaning is that....love is also cruel

Love is happiness...another implied meaning is that love is also sadness....

Love is having somebody there for u...would mean that u would have to be alone since he/she is not there for u....

and

Love is what keeps u going...yeah right...love is what also stops u from moving on...

Why didn't anyone tell us of all this???

U feel that u are dispirited if he/she is not around...
The terrible feeling of missing someone when he/she is not there...
The pain of anticipation and waiting...
The sadness when u know that he/she is sad and u cant do anything...
The helpless and hopeless feeling that u have when u cant be there...
The anxiousness...resahnye...tak senang duduk when u feel that something is a miss....

They didnt tell u all that...why....
Love is not all flowers and rainbows...
Its also not all colourful and beautiful...

Its ... just not what it seems...